Man Talk 22nd March 2015

Tell me why I don't like Mondays goes the song. Turns out what we really don't like is Sunday night. The thought of going to work the next day after a good weekend really spoils our sleep pattern say the boffins.  Maybe that's why  the next day is a 'Manic Monday' for some people 

For sale on Ebay bags of air possibly belonging to Kanye West. The sellers say it was captured at on of his recent concerts. This unique prize Can be yours to own at the give away price of a $1000 a time. Here's a tip if your thinking of buying one? If it's his it's still be hot! 

By now you'd have thought the beard trend would be fading. But no, it seems to be getting its second wind. An exhibition has just opened in London dedicated to facial fuzz. And now a specialist beard website had been launched. Called 'Bristlr' it gives tips and advice on how to manage and cultivate your facial hair, as well as a collection of beard options from the 'Ships Captain' to 'The Explorer' and 'The Lumberjack' and of course everyone's favourite 'The Father Christmas'. 

The world tour of clothes horses better known as fashion week has just come to an end. And the big question men over 40 are being told they need to address is do they know the difference between fashionable and stylish. My rule of thumb is anything in the window of  Primark is fashionable for everything else its John Lewis 

The big story for mens fashion is a return to all things seventies, big flares big collars and of course big hair. The Kevin Keegan man perm is Much in demand. But Calm down calm down if your hairstyle of choice isn't bang on trend. I'm sure it won't be long before the 'combover'and the no1 shaved look will have its day. 

We've all got a friend like Andy Murray- someone who thinks it's a good laugh to drop you in it. Andy thought it was a hoot to tell the world about his tennis partner having a part time girlfriend in Glasgow, whilst his regular other half was back at home on London.Whatever happend to the code of the 'bro' what happens on tour stays on tour, I think it would be a real Life case of 'new balls please' when he got home! 

This weeks mens public service announcement - doctors have found that 'man Flu' is real and is much stronger than the normal flu the ladies get. Doctors  say it's caused by all that testosterone weakening mens immune system.  Girls we don't want you to make a fuss just know most of us are carrying on and suffering in silence. 

In India a bride walked out on her fiancée because he couldn't add up the sum fifteen plus six. He said the answer was seventeen. She was so annoyed, she promptly dumped him. Claiming she'd been Mis lead about his education. Maybe he'd just put two and two together and realised she wasn't right for him. 

 In other Indian wedding news this week, I heard the story of the groom who had a heart attack during the ceremony, so the bride married another guest instead! Well it would have been a shame to waste the cake wouldn't it? 

Man Talk 8th March 2015

A report this week said that we men have at least two pair of trousers in our wardrobe that don't fit. The best excuses are you picked up the wrong size and can't be bothered taking them back. Or you plan on slimming down into them( note it's never the other way - you plan on growing into them! ) 

But For any man feeling pleased that he can still fit into the same size pants as he did in his youth, despite an obvious growing waistline, here is some bad news: boys are becoming victims of The retailing trend 'vanity sizing'. Where clothes can be anything up two sizes bigger than they say on the label. Aways popular with the girls its now being used more and more in men's clothing. In the trade it's called  "manity sizing' of course I don't believe a word if it and would like to continue living in slimline blissfull ignorance. 

What's in a name? Well quite a lot if your a horse called Brian - the Police think Brian's name wasn't heroic enough to be one of its front line  ponies so rejected him! Neigh!!!!

Remember the idea of the paperless office, and how the internet is  going to save the planet because we will be recording everything on line or on discs. Well guess what, technology is moving so fast that a lot of recorded stuff is out if date and could now be lost, but don't worry they've found a solution. Break out the paper and pens everyone. 

The more expensive the restaurant the more likely you are to describe its food in sexual terms says research in America. Orgasmic, and sensual or sexy and naughty are some of the favourites. Where as cheaper restaurants are often described as a drug related experiences. Words such as addictive, craved and  hooked are commonly used. Maybe that explains why I describe my lunchtime sausage roll as a quick fix.

Everyone likes to embellish their CV's just a little, to get an edge. But how about adding that In 2006 you were Time magazines person of the year. And it's true, In 2006 the influential magazine  made "Everyone" their person of the year.

 It recognized the millions of people who contribute to social media. So as as long as you tweet, message or post, that award was recognition for you. Congratulations you've got the job! 

Former footballing 'hard man' and wannabe actor Vinnie Jones is now plying his vocal talents on U Tube giving Spanish lessons. I've seen him and I'm afraid It's a red card from me 

The term having a face only a mother could love seems appropriate if you've passed the Liverpool shop in Williamson Square lately. The posters of the players in the windows wouldn't look out of place on crime watch. Obviously the photographer doesn't have the luxury of Photoshop. 

And on the subject of Liverpool football club. They've gone from

 the Spice boys to the Nivea boys. They must be going soft - their hands that is !