Man Talk 30th November 2014

Have you ever been a victim of 'Man-spread' the increasing problem of men hogging seats by sitting with their legs spread to far apart. It's becoming such a problem on the New York Subway that they are starting a poster campaign to discourage it. However your native New Yorker isn't taking this problem sitting down.  Now an alternative campaign to promote the benefits of 'spreading the Load' is being launched. who knew that their is medical benefits to sitting spread eagled as they say,in fact sitting with legs squeezed together is bad for you they claim. maybe to avoid complaints you should just get yourself a doctors note.

Let's do 'Munch' or the increasing trend amongst men of getting together for lunch . Well if it's good enough for the girlies and for the David Beckham set. Sound much more elegant than - 'I'm going for a pie and a pint' 

Sex symbols come in all shapes an sizes. Take Eric Pickles for example this cabinet minister is a pin up boy in Siberia of all places. He gets so many requests for photographs. He's told his cabinet office to ignore them and throw them all in the bin. Maybe Siberian women like their men with a bit of meat on them, in which case Eric certainly fits the bill! 

Sitting in my dentists waiting room the other day I was flicking through a magazine then noticed it was from 2010, when I checked the pile the other mags where from the same year . Couldn't believe it. It was like taking a step back in time unfortunately my dentist wasn't as nostalgic and still charged me 2014 prices. Next time I think I'll ask him to give my credit card an anaesthetic as well, to numb the pain as I hand it over to pay! 

You know the saying he's 'talking out his backside ' well soon you may actually be able to play music out of it. A Spanish audio scientist has developed a way of using the natural rhythms of your body to broadcast musical sounds he uses an audio player connected underneath a bicycle seat as an example. The sound vibrations generated travel up through your body which act as the speakers. Just hope he doesn't hit any bum notes. 

NYC Get tough with 'ManSpread'

The urban dictionary describes 'ManSpread' as : 

'When a dude sits on a chair and spreads his leg and makes a 'V' shape with them.

Such is the problem, that on the NewYork transit system, they are putting posters to discourage the practice - sighting that it takes up to much room. 

It's a problem we are probably becoming accustomed to here in Britain. We've  probably all witnessed  that over exposed slouched pose adopted by some young men,  On the British equivalent to the subway, the underground or on buses or anywhere where we have to sit and wait. Doctors waiting rooms, and airport lounges, are a breaking ground for ManSpread 

This uniquely male orientated position is a current trend amongst the young. Call it a lack of respect or just someone comfortable in displaying their own body language. It's a pose seldom displayed by women. 

Whilst physiologists and body language experts may explain the position as some deep rooted display of sexual beckoning or perhaps it's the equivalent of the open palm gesture of being harmless and defenceless. Whatever it's subconscious roots the fact is a 'ManSpread takes up far to much room and int the case of the New York Transit System to many seats- three on average to be precise. 

Whilst the over exposed and elongated leg pose hasn't reached epidemic proportions or resulted in any fisticuffs. It does cause arguments and resentment. Those opposing the position say it's an aggressive selfish action that restricts seats and leg room for adjacent passengers. Whilst those in

Favour of the extra leg space,  say that on medical grounds alone it shouldn't be discouraged. They say The skin around the testicles is only a very fine membrane and the pressure applied by confining leg movement could encourage health problems. They argue that some men need that option of a wider leg spread to either discourage or deal with genital problems. 

Like everything else in America this is an argument that will probably become a question of civil liberties and whether it is a mans right to be able to 'spread his legs'- See you in court !!

 

America's Love Affair With The British Class System

America – often thought of as the land of opportunity, a society that likes to think of itself as classless, a country that has welcomed the poor with open arms and huddled masses, escaping tyranny and persecution. So why, oh why does ‘The Land of the Free’ have such a fascination with Royalty and Britain’s Class System. To put it bluntly, why exactly do Americans love a bit of posh?

It was, after all, the oppression of a British monarchy that they fought a revolution over, and yet nearly two hundred and fifty years later they are prepared to queue for hours and travel unimagined distances to welcome back the Future King William, and his ‘princess’ Kate.

Such is the American fascination with our royal family that they generate as much TV air time and column inches of press as the closest thing to American Royalty the Obama’s.

Perhaps the American love affair with their British heritage was rekindled by Princess Diana. She truly was a fairytale princess in the eyes of the American public. She captivated the then President Reagan, and became a friend of the Hollywood A – list, who next to her melted into insignificance. Her tragic death only heightened her popularity, and the myth of Royalty became cemented by her two sons whose lives have been meticulously documented as they grew from boys to men.

The Queen, her castles, and the historic nature of royalty and the respect it endures in Britain seem to have rubbed of on its distant cousins across the sea, who sometimes treat our Royal family as if it were their own.

And it’s a love affair that has permeated down through Britain’s Class System. The TV series Downton Abbey is welcomed with as much anticipation as any home grown TV programme. Lord and Lady Grantham and their aristocratic brood, although only actors are treated with the same difference and respect as any authentic ennobled family.

America unquestionably loves Britain’s Class System, and if it were to be put to a vote as to whether they would welcome their own Royal family or even a branch of our own, it would certainly give freedom and independence a close run for its money.

Here in the UK we have our own love affair with royalty, but ours is far more selective. We can extend our unqualified respect and loyalty to the queen and the immediate Royal Family. Beyond that we become far more cynical. In America they are far less discerning and pushy princesses and wayward butlers are received with open arms, in the highest circles.

Our own love of the brusque tones of a native New Yorker is matched by their own passion for a posh plummy accent. That British stiff upper-class tone, mastered to perfection by current Hollywood favourites Keira Knightley and Dominic Cumberbatch, is much in demand for the more serious film roles.

Whilst Hollywood and its cast of homegrown stars may excel in producing many genres of movies, it turns to Old England for its period dramas. Nobody can do gravitas like a former Shakespearian player. It’s the Old Etonian or the ‘Oxbridge’ graduate they turn to in order to carry a costume drama.

Here we may resent the posh boys and the class system. In the U.S they positively welcome it. Being Posh lends itself to so many roles. From the ‘Expert’ to the ‘Baddie’ or the ‘Evil Genius'; having a plummy accent is a welcome addition to any cast. The ‘titled’ Lord or Lady is always a symbol for wealth and power, and the ennobling of an actor with a ‘Sir’ or ‘Dame’ only adds to their box office appeal.

Producers such as the Weinstein’s recognise the attraction of a British based storyline when you’re hunting for award winning opportunities. Multi Oscar winner The King’s Speech, and the current much heralded Imitation Game, rely heavily on the clichéd ‘Englishness’ of its cast.

It’s hard to believe that once upon a time being considered posh was a negative attribute. Now it’s positively encouraged. Being royal, well-educated or just plain posh is becoming a valuable asset. Having been Made in Chelsea may not be a guarantee to success, but it certainly helps especially if your trying to make it in America.

Man Talk 16th November 2014

Man Talk 16th November 2014

Well I got to a very disappointing  day eight of 'Movember' before that smudge that was emerging slowly above my top lip got to much for me and I shaved it away. My dreams of recreating the full on macho man moustache that looks so good on Tom Sellick or Burt Reynolds failed due to a combination of vanity ( I thought I looked stupid!) and a tash on a grow slow.  

It looked so pathetic my commitment to the cause had to bite the dust for another year. I think it would take until next Movember before I had anything to show- still as they say it was for 'charadee' so remember Mo or No you've still got to donate 

Chancellor of The Exchequer George Osborne is becoming a bit of a hair style icon his new shorter do is much in demand especially amongst city types it seems

A style book for ginger blokes is being touted to the girls as the Christmas gift to buy for the Mick Hucknall in your life. It features celebrity redheads, can't see a pasty faced Ed Sheeran being anyone's style inspiration.

A survey has found that the rock and roll lifestyle really is bad for you, The party all the time attitude can knock over 25 years off your life. What is it they say live fast die young 

Music polls are big news this week

Can you believe in a survey Bohemian Rhapsody was voted the song that makes us feel better when we are Ill. That's right hearing the opening lines 'Momma just killed a man' cheers us right up. And do we really want to hear 'Dancing Queen' or Robbie Williams murdering some 'Angels' when we've got man-flu. Most of us just  want to lie in a quiet room, and listen to the sound of silence.  

Another poll told us that it takes us 2.5 seconds to recognise the Spice Girls song  'Wannabe'. Its the most recognisable song on the radio. What it failed to mention is that it only takes us a further 0.5 seconds to lean over and switch it off. 

So now Wayne Rooney thinks he's got a bit of a voice. Seen him having a singalong with Ed Sheeran, on You Tube. As one of Harry Enfield's old characters might have said. Oi ROONEY NO!!! Hasn't that mouth of yours got you in enough trouble! Save your voice for moaning at your useless team mates. 

Articles I passed on reading this week included  the secrets of David Gandys underwear collection. May google it if I've got time on my hands because hells frozen over! 

Very British gangsters – The Peaky Blinders

Very British gangsters – The Peaky Blinders

Credit to the BBC for commissioning and then sticking by their 1920’s based very British gangster series ‘The Peaky Blinders’

Imagine sitting at the commissioning meeting and the producers having to begin their pitch by explaining how they came by the title. – How it comes from the name of the Birmingham gang that acquired a reputation for using a razor blade hidden In the ‘peak’ of their caps, and how, in vicious street fights. They would use the blade to slash opponents.

You might expect that in these politically correct times, at this point most commissioning execs, would make a polite excuse and withdraw. but wisely they stuck by the producers, and here we are with season two just finished and an eager audience crying out for a date for the next instalment.

When you think of the BBC’s drama output, a 1920’s Birmingham street gang isn’t a natural fit. But such us the quality of the storyline and it’s originality, it attracted a Stellar cast. The star of Jurasic Park Sam Neil, and a pair of Batman villains Ciilian Murphy and Tom Hardy give the series it’s Hollywood edge. Neil in particular brings real menace to his role as Major Campbell the shadowy police officer.

But it’s Murphy as the Machiavellian Tommy Shelby who holds the series together. Set against the backdrop of the end of the First World War and the beginnings of the troubles in Ireland. It’s Shelby who fights to hold his family and it’s ‘businesses’ together. Scarred by the war but emboldened by his survival of it. The story revolves around Tommy’s plans for the future and every gangsters dream, to make their business ‘legit’

As the Shelby empire has grown so has Tommy’s ambition. Plans to expand the family empire into London gave the script writers the opportunity to introduce some new characters. And none bigger badder or madder, than ‘Alfie Solomon’ played by Hardy. He was an inspired choice. An over the top performance that added another level of violence to an already blood soaked storyline.

Gangs seperated along racial and ethnic divides where a theme of the series the Catholic IRA, The Shelby Gypsy connections and the Italians and the Jews who ran London.

Against this melting pot of crime, a corrupt police service paid lip service to the highest bidders. Whilst Neil’s Major Cambell was as viscious and violent as any of the criminals, his intentions had its own corrupt authenticity. But in the end even he divided his loyalties along sectarian lines, with his aligance to the Protestant Red hand of Ulster.

The series had the murder count of any of its Hollywood counterparts The Sopranos or Boardwalk Empire, but upped the graphic death rate in this series.

Some of the features of ‘The Blinders’ that gives the series it’s gloss are the costumes and settings. The production costs must have been a huge part of the budget.The styling is first class, from the swagger of the men’s suits, to the authentic cropped haircuts. It’s the attention to detail that grabs you. Set that alongside the locations and backdrops and you have the foundations of the series success

The producers haven’t pandered to an international audience and all the characters adopt accents particular to their heritage. From the broad ‘black country’ accent of the Shelby clan. To Major Campbell’s broad Northern Irish brogue.

It’s been a sumptuous production that deserves all its applause. But with the characters all established now, the problem for the writers is how they take the series forward for a third instalment. The cast as much in demand for the big screen as their work on the Blinders, and assembling a cast of this quality could be problematic.

Like so many series that end leaving us wanting more, We’ve become accustomed to rushed new episodes to meet demand. Producers fall into the ‘casualty’ scenario the BBC medical drama where episodes become formulaic and predictable. What was fresh and original had becomes stale and uninspired.

A Series like ‘The Peaky Blinders’ has introduced us to a whole new genre of british gangster. We have until now associated that era with American Criminals such as Al Capone. In Thomas Shelby we have our own gangster number one.

The writers now have to pull off the trick of keeping the originality of the series and the freshness of the story lines, no easy task, but we live in hope and await the difficult third series with baited breathe.

 

   

« Euro 2016 Qualifying: England maintain 100% Record

Wayne Rooney: The Footballer the Fans Love to Hate

For every footballing hero there’s just as many villains. Those pantomime soccer-bad-boys who rather than cheer at, we jeer at, every time they touch the ball.

The former Liverpool, now Barcelona player, Luis Suarez is universally disliked for his on field activities and would probably be described by most fans as a ‘cheat’, and nobody  likes a ‘cheat’ in sport. Any kind of bad sportsmanship in the heat of battle, never fails to bring out the worst in the fans.

The beautiful game has never been short of players, who (for what ever reason), we just don’t like. Every club has it’s villains, but it takes a special kind of badness, or madness, to gain universal displeasure.

Suarez’s actions could be blamed on his Latin temperament, but the fans reaction, Latin or not, is typical. It generates the same passionate response as the love/hate relationship they have with our own Wayne Rooney.

Rooney became ‘Public enemy number one’ for Everton fans, after they claimed he betrayed the club he always supported, and joined one of their bitter rivals Manchester United.

Fans believed he’d pledged his loyalty to the blue half of Merseyside. A footballing prodigy gifted and talented. Identified at a very young age as being a ‘special player’ with a huge future. Photographs of him in his now infamous ‘Once A Blue’ T-shirt hung pride of place in many a blue household, as was the optimism he instilled in the Everton fans. His subsequent transfer turned him into a hate figure overnight in his home town.

His move to Manchester was no bed of roses. He took a long time to win over his new clubs supporters, despite his obvious talents. A deep rooted dislike of ‘scousers’ only drew a begrudged appreciation of his skills.

Rooney has spent all of his footballing life in the spotlight. A precocious young talent, his strength and skills became apparent early on. He made his debut in 2002 for the team he has supported since childhood. He claimed that joining Everton football club was all he ever wanted. The fans rejoiced at having a home-grown superstar amongst their ranks. When he left the club in 2004 it was like a dagger to the heart, it made no difference that his leaving was to join one of the biggest clubs in the world.

Still only eighteen, the reported twenty million pounds transfer fee was a welcome windfall for a debt ridden club, but did little to appease the angry Everton fans who believed Rooney’s departure was driven by greed and was a slap in the face for those who believed he could have been the catalyst the club needed to take it back into the big time.

Rooney quickly repaid his huge fee to his new paymasters by helping them gain further honours including the Premiership title, and a Champions League final.

Rooney also established himself as a regular in the England team, and achieved the most prestigious of prizes, being both Manchester United and England captain. He also continues to re-write the record books, becoming Manchester United’s leading goal scorer of all time and is now only a few goals short of achieving the same distinction for his country.

Not a bad achievement for the lad from ‘Crocy’ and yet those achievements carry little weight with the fans. He is still the subject of the most extreme abuse, both on and off the pitch.

The question is: Why does one footballer generate so much hostility? Could it be many see him as a footballing child prodigy that showed so much potential, so much passion, yet wasted his opportunities? A catalogue of indiscretions have infuriated the fans. From Holding his boss at Manchester United, the formidable Sir Alex Ferguson, to ransom for a pay rise and getting it, and being acclaimed as the champion who would deliver Everton out of the shadow of their more successful rivals Liverpool to then walk away. He is pilloried for letting down his country with to many poor performances for England, and then exposed by the tabloids after his reported affair with a prostitute.

For all these sins some fans can forgive but the majority cannot forget. Such has the press hammered on his failings; he’s long lost any quest for redemption. The most he can now muster from fans is a grudging respect for effort and for some outstanding goals.

As a footballer, he is an enigma. He would be on every managers wish list. His skills, his strength, his commitment. They all want a Rooney in their team. Unfortunately  the fans don’t.

Maybe Rooney was a star who peaked to soon. Maybe it’s his surly arrogance the fans don’t like. Or perhaps it’s just because he isn’t in your team. Fans will forgive you anything if you play for them. Look at the devotion Liverpool fans heaped on Luis Suarez.

Sadly, today’s modern footballer is expected to talk as good a game as he’s expected to play it. Personality and good PR are key to a players perception. Maybe that’s where it went wrong for Wayne.

Who knows, If he’d done a little less’ kissing and dissing’  the badge, and a little more kissing the babies, ‘Wayne’s World’ might be a totally different one.

Film Review - Nightcrawler

There's a buzz in Hollywood land that when the awards start being given out next year Jake Gyllenhall will be finding his name in the hat for a prize. 

Gyllenhall who is finally starting to get the attention his talents deserve, gives a mesmerising performance as the creepy Lou Bloom in this modern day allegory on our appetite for 24 hour TV News.

Director Dan Gilroy better known for his screenwriting skills is making his directorial debut with this movie and he handles the step up with great confidence. But credit to Gyllenhall for creating a character (Lou Bloom) that watching him makes you feel uneasy. He plays as a sociopath eager to please and quick to learn, especially when he gets a job as a stringer (a freelance cameraman) chasing the latest local news stories around Los Angeles. 

Our demand for the breaking story with the graphic image is pandered to by the 24 hour news channels, Gilroy exposes not only the cut throat world of local news but the story behind the story chasers. 

The TV station director played by Gilroy's wife Rennee Russo has tapped into the psyche of what we want our news to be. We want it graphic we want it raw and it needs the fear factor. Gyllenhall's character gets it and moves from following the stories to creating them. 

The film is dark and uncomfortable especially when Gyllenhall is in the scene. He really gets under the skin of his character, and it's this quiet controlled portrait of a sociopath, that has won him the plaudits. 

Nightcrawler is a study in the dark under world that Feeds our need news. A Stand out performances from Gyllenhall will surely see him touted as a potential Oscar nominee and don't be surprised if Russo gets the nod for her understated but outstanding supporting role. 

This is a solid thoughtful film that is well worth seeing 

Man Talk 2nd November 2014

Forget about pouring water over your head, the new awareness-raising trend for men is supposed to be all about drawing attention to testicular cancer. However taking a selfie of yourself crotch grabbing, then hashtagging it  #feelingnuts ( there's a joke in there ) isn't the most elegant way of raising awareness

Outrage in toy-land this week when a new slimline Bob The Builder showed up for work. The new Children's TV 'Bob' has had a makeover and some people don't like it. Commentators say the 'new Bob' is too skinny that he looks like he'd over charge and probably be a Ukip voter!

Had to laugh at David Cameron's outrage at being asked to pay a seven billion pound bill to the EU and him complaining about it being to high and not having enough time to pay. Welcome to the real world Mr Prime minister you've obviously never had to deal with Her Majestys Customs and Revenue. 

Mike Bassett the hopeless England manager is to work again, well on film anyway. Ricky Tomlinson is getting his job back and reviving the character for a new film. However after seeing some of Roy Hodgsons performances in front of the camera you wonder if he ever went away 

Heard about the panda that's Been  faking a pregnancy to get more food. The keepers say she got away with it because with pandas,telling if their  pregnant isn't always black or white ha ha ha 

They may not be top dogs for to much longer Those two top male models David Beckham and David Gandy that is, are being challenged by a new young pup on the fashion scene Bodhi, a four-year-old Shiba Inu (that's a breed of dog) also known as Menswear Dog, has over 146,000 followers on Instagram and models everything from suits, to ties and sunglasses. Can't imagine he'd look that great in pair of white thunderpants though 

You can now buy spreadable beer in Italy? Wonder how many sandwiches you can eat before your over the limit 

Japan had urged its citizens to stock up on loo rolls after a volcano threatened to erupt close to its number one toilet paper production plant. I think they'll need more than toilet rolls if that goes off. 

In china you can now buy yourself a virtual girlfriend she contactable 24 7 via your mobile phone. You can choose a personality for your imaginary little miss perfect and the makers promise that she'll always be there for you with comforting little messages or to listen to your complaints, I'm sure when their wives find out they'll be getting their own personalised reality check. 

They say every problem is also an opportunity. Take the Ebola virus for example In the USA some people are treating it as a 'business' opportunity. 'Ebola’- emblazoned t-shirts and bags are selling like hot cakes, Ebola hazard suits are the big sellers for Halloween and there's even an Ebola microbe toy for kids. When one entrepreneur was asked why he was cashing in on the potential global catastrophe he said because like  ‘fashion its infectious’